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Thread: The Rebel & The King

  1. #181
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by Diane View Post
    Franny I don't know if I'm one your are asking this question of but here is how I feel. If my husband cheated on me once I could forgive that and go on but yes, I wouldn't ever feel the same nor forget...I'd always wonder whether he'd do it again and feel sad that he didn't love me enough to avoid the temptation. My love wouldn't be as strong either because he wouldn't be the person I thought he was. That happened to one of my best friends and as far as I know, her husband didn't do it again, but as I would, her feelings for him changed...she's still with him.
    Hi Diane, anyone can answer the question I asked. I was replying to KPM, but it's not exclusive to him. I do think it's not an easy thing to go through or answer...and I think, unless in that situation, one can't be sure what one will do. I know for myself, I don't think I could forgive something like that. Trust and respect is a big thing for me. Having said that, I haven't been in that situation or in anyones' shoes and I'm not judging. My heart goes out to the ones' that have been cheated on...I have seen what it does to a person.

    Yes, it's the always wondering if that person will do it again, that's something that one has to live with, if they choose to stay.

  2. #182
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    Donut had me figured out. Im just a cranky old geezer. This weekend will be exciting though. Im buying some tennis balls to put on the legs of my walker. I may even go nuts and buy orange balls.
    I think you're a lot harder to figure out I mean that in a good way btw. You a cranky geezer? Never! Tennis balls on a walker?

  3. #183
    TCB Mafia jak's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by franny View Post
    I think you're a lot harder to figure out I mean that in a good way btw. You a cranky geezer? Never! Tennis balls on a walker?
    Haven't you ever seen tennis balls on walker legs? They cut them and stick them over the feet on the walkers. See what I mean,Im such a geezer you don't even know what Im rambling on about! The tennis balls enable the walker to slide over floors easier. That way you don't have to pick it up every step you take. Ive got my eye on a newer model that has wheels. Im gonna be a chick magnet if I get it. I will have my pick of the babes on Bingo night.

  4. #184
    PeacockLady Diane's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Race you Jak!!!!! I may be little but I'm fast!

  5. #185
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    Haven't you ever seen tennis balls on walker legs? They cut them and stick them over the feet on the walkers. See what I mean,Im such a geezer you don't even know what Im rambling on about! The tennis balls enable the walker to slide over floors easier. That way you don't have to pick it up every step you take. Ive got my eye on a newer model that has wheels. Im gonna be a chick magnet if I get it. I will have my pick of the babes on Bingo night.
    I can't say I have ever seen tennis balls on walker legs That's very creative indeed lol You really should patent that idea. I almost believed you there, for a split second...until you mentioned being a chick magnet

  6. #186
    TCB Mafia jak's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    That tennis ball thing is real and I can't take credit for it. Folks have been doing it for years. As far as me being a chick magnet,Im a geezer not dead. I see the chicks lookin my way when I turn my bingo cards in.

  7. #187
    TCB Mafia jak's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by Diane View Post
    Race you Jak!!!!! I may be little but I'm fast!
    Youre gonna have to give me a head start speedy!

  8. #188
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    That tennis ball thing is real and I can't take credit for it. Folks have been doing it for years. As far as me being a chick magnet,Im a geezer not dead. I see the chicks lookin my way when I turn my bingo cards in.
    It's real? Well, it sounded like such a good idea.
    You're no geezer! And those chicks know what they were doing lol bingo is just an excuse, they are there to see you

  9. #189
    TCB Mafia jak's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by franny View Post
    It's real? Well, it sounded like such a good idea.
    You're no geezer! And those chicks know what they were doing lol bingo is just an excuse, they are there to see you
    Yeah I knew that.I like to give them a thrill.Pinch a few cheeks on the way in.You know how it goes

  10. #190
    TCB Mafia KPM's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by franny View Post
    I had it all written and got booted out...it timed out

    I don't know how any spouse can forgive being cheated on. There's lots that can't, that's why there's so many divorces. Most of the time it's because of affairs. Yes, (some) stay in the marriage. Whether, it's for the children, convenience or they don't have a good income. I would say, the love would never be as it was before....trust and respect are too big and once tampered with, something is lost that never comes back.

    Now cheating even once, sorry I don't think if you love your spouse you would do that. I don't think, "things just happen". You are not unconscious when it happens, you are quite aware of what you are doing. I think when someone crosses that line of being with someone else, there's a total lack of respect for their spouse. Nobody goes knocking on someone's door asking a married person to cheat, so I would say, some go out looking for it. At that point, I would say there's something wrong with the marriage and that they don't really "love" or are "in love" with their spouse.


    Let me ask you this and I won't anything else. If your wife cheated once, you stated it's a free pass. What if she cheated for 6 months or a year, would you still feel the same love for her? Would you trust and respect her? I don't think anyone cheats "just once". I have cousins and friends who have been cheated on...it was never just once...they divorced their siginificant other. Btw, no disrespect to your wife.
    The understanding we have had for 40 years is once-meaning "one affair" I am not going to put a number on the amount of "tumbles in bed"
    An affair could last 6 months, or one night...
    I love my wife-she loves me-but we are "people"...... imperfect humans who can do irrational things in our lives that are mistakes.
    IF I doubted that my wife loved me- I might worry about about a "mistake" in judgement that could happen.
    If it did happen-I know..."bottom line" she loves me-and just messed up.
    You see I think where we differ is I believe that love conquers all-true love (that you are defending if I understand your points) will conquer the bad judgement, the bad mistake of an affair.
    As I said-for you and others an affair would be a deal breaker-not for me, not for my wife...we would not stay together for our kids, or money....it would be because of our true love-but realizing we are not perfect humans, we can err...even in marriage.
    Neither of us has cheated in 40 years-but if it had happened-we would still have made it to "40 Years"
    She is the love of my llife and I could forgive her anything.
    Work in Progress!

  11. #191
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    Yeah I knew that.I like to give them a thrill.Pinch a few cheeks on the way in.You know how it goes
    Oh, I do know how it goes. I'm sure you give them a big thrill...just be careful as to what cheeks you pinch.

    There's a tornado warning here, so I think my PC will soon stop working. Modern times and all lol

  12. #192
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by KPM View Post
    The understanding we have had for 40 years is once-meaning "one affair" I am not going to put a number on the amount of "tumbles in bed"
    An affair could last 6 months, or one night...
    I love my wife-she loves me-but we are "people"...... imperfect humans who can do irrational things in our lives that are mistakes.
    IF I doubted that my wife loved me- I might worry about about a "mistake" in judgement that could happen.
    If it did happen-I know..."bottom line" she loves me-and just messed up.
    You see I think where we differ is I believe that love conquers all-true love (that you are defending if I understand your points) will conquer the bad judgement, the bad mistake of an affair.
    As I said-for you and others an affair would be a deal breaker-not for me, not for my wife...we would not stay together for our kids, or money....it would be because of our true love-but realizing we are not perfect humans, we can err...even in marriage.
    Neither of us has cheated in 40 years-but if it had happened-we would still have made it to "40 Years"
    She is the love of my llife and I could forgive her anything.
    See the difference to me is, when you truly love someone, you wouldn't have the affair. That is what true love is to me. That I would be with someone that I could trust and respect. It's not about bad judgment or making a mistake, it's about being able to know that you are in a committed relationship and that cheating wouldn't be in our vocabulary. There shouldn't be an affair to deal with and if you truly love someone, you don't put them in that position of having them "forgive" you. With the trust and respect gone, I would think there's not much left.

    Btw, I commend you for being faithful to your wife and happy 40th.

  13. #193
    PeacockLady Diane's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    I understand Ken's points. When you live with someone and love them, you can't just shut that love off because of the mistake of a weak moment. Things may not be the same but if the mistake is not repeated you can work through it and in time it would get better. I haven't had to deal with that issue and I know it would not be easy but I'm not the type to give up on a relationship (or a friend) easily).

  14. #194
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    Once you're spouse cheats I think a normal relationship is damaged forever. Some people might be able to put it behind them I guess. I just think it would be a dark cloud that would always hang over you're head. It would probably be used as a dagger every time you got into a heated argument.
    Exactly how I feel about it!

  15. #195
    PeacockLady Diane's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by jak View Post
    Once you're spouse cheats I think a normal relationship is damaged forever. Some people might be able to put it behind them I guess. I just think it would be a dark cloud that would always hang over you're head. It would probably be used as a dagger every time you got into a heated argument.
    You're right it would never be the same and used as a weapon in arguments. I would be hard to do otherwise but I have seen a couple of friends overcome it and go on. I don't know what goes on in their private lives and I don't ask. I just feel if the relationship is good enough for them, all the more power to them....they're both strong women.

  16. #196
    TCB Mafia KPM's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by franny View Post
    See the difference to me is, when you truly love someone, you wouldn't have the affair. That is what true love is to me. That I would be with someone that I could trust and respect. It's not about bad judgment or making a mistake, it's about being able to know that you are in a committed relationship and that cheating wouldn't be in our vocabulary. There shouldn't be an affair to deal with and if you truly love someone, you don't put them in that position of having them "forgive" you. With the trust and respect gone, I would think there's not much left.

    Btw, I commend you for being faithful to your wife and happy 40th.
    I understand what you are saying many people feel that way and many divorce over those situations-but I do not see life in absolutes...IE if A happens and B happens then C must happen and that is the only way it can be. That is how wars happen, that is how people are backed into corners and must do things that latter they regret or look back upon with sadness.
    Sure everyone should be totally committed to their mate-their should be no reason for transgressions-but we are not all "tall angels".
    Infactuations, lapses of morals, anger, fear, lust-all creep into relationships and some just do not handle them well....it causes problems and some people resolve them and then they move on.

    I wish we were all "tall angels" but we are not...matter of fact most are not even close... but humans are not expected to be angels.
    Work in Progress!

  17. #197
    TCB Mafia Princess franny's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by KPM View Post
    I understand what you are saying many people feel that way and many divorce over those situations-but I do not see life in absolutes...IE if A happens and B happens then C must happen and that is the only way it can be. That is how wars happen, that is how people are backed into corners and must do things that latter they regret or look back upon with sadness.
    Sure everyone should be totally committed to their mate-their should be no reason for transgressions-but we are not all "tall angels".
    Infactuations, lapses of morals, anger, fear, lust-all creep into relationships and some just do not handle them well....it causes problems and some people resolve them and then they move on.

    I wish we were all "tall angels" but we are not...matter of fact most are not even close... but humans are not expected to be angels.
    I'm not judging anyone. What's right for you, may not be right for me. I just know for me that I could not stay in a committed relationship if someone cheated on me. Yes, we're all different and I can only say what I would do. However, I may deal with it differently IF it happened to me. I respect your opinions on this.

    I'm a tall angel btw

  18. #198
    I'm only Your elvia7's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    I know one thing, if love is sincere in marriage is not what we do not talk.I know many people who say that their relationship is good.
    Nonsense!
    True love may be invisible to get to know the signals.
    And one more thing ...
    I'll Remember You!!!

  19. #199
    TCB Mafia KPM's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Quote Originally Posted by franny View Post
    I'm not judging anyone. What's right for you, may not be right for me. I just know for me that I could not stay in a committed relationship if someone cheated on me. Yes, we're all different and I can only say what I would do. However, I may deal with it differently IF it happened to me. I respect your opinions on this.

    I'm a tall angel btw
    Well in the realm of marital faithfullness-I guess I am a tall angel, and my wife also-but we have are faults, weaknesses and strengths...
    Work in Progress!

  20. #200
    PeacockLady Diane's Avatar
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    Re: The Rebel & The King

    Well I'm short but I would never call myself an angel....I'd have to live up to it. Both my husband and I have plenty of faults and make a lot of mistakes but we have always gotten through it and we have pride in that...and of course love each other enough.

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