10 Things You Didn't Know About Priscilla Presley

[Teddy]

1. Contrary to Priscilla's press release, she isn't 5' 4" tall.
When not wearing her adorable 'raised' shoes, she is barely 5 ft.
Elvis himself believed her to be 4' 11".

2. People who like Priscilla Presley can expect to live longer.
Harboring resentment is a deadly pastime, and angry grudges (as a result of spiteful misinformation about Cilla) can significantly reduce life expectancy.

3. Lionel Ritchie's wife is indirectly responsible for the illegally administered procedure which has temporarily compromised Cilla's facial beauty.

4. The assertion that Priscilla was a virgin on her wedding day was concocted to protect Elvis's reputation, not Priscilla's.

5. Priscilla never actually claimed to have been raped by Elvis, and she never actually wrote Elvis and Me, either.

6. Like all the most enjoyable things in life, looking at pictures of Priscilla Presley which have been taken in the 1960s and 70s can result in severe dehydration over time, so regularly drinking fluids is recommended.

7. The blame for Priscilla's regrettable involvement in $cientology lies entirely with John Travolta, who endeavored to indoctrinate daughter Lisa on the same occasion. Anybody wishing to express disappointment that Elvis's offspring (and a proportion of his posthumous earnings) have found themselves sucked into this transparent shakedown scheme should take it up with The Buffoon from Battlefield Earth.

8. Cur*ie Gr*nt spends a maximum of 3 minutes a day not thinking about Priscilla Presley, and remains so fixated that he is happy to be accused of statutory rape if it means that people might believe he slept with her.

9. Ch*ld Br*de is essentially pornography for people who don't like Priscilla Presley. It was written to profit from the culture of Cilla-cynicism which infests an unfortunate faction of Elvis's fanbase.

10. Priscilla's hair smells incredibly good, and staring directly into her eyes creates the sensation of your stomach filling with bumble bees.

[Lisarose]

Priscilla overload, but thanks for setting me straight!

[Teddy]

I know you can handle it.

[Diane]

LOL, we sure know who the author of this is....

On the first thing, I always heard that Priscilla was 5ft. 3 in. and that Lisa was the same or an inch shorter????? I find it hard to believe that either of them wasn't 5 ft.

As for two and six......

Diane

[Teddy]

On the first thing, I always heard that Priscilla was 5ft. 3 in. and that Lisa was the same or an inch shorter????? I find it hard to believe that either of them wasn't 5 ft.

When I met Priscilla, I realized that she was the smallest fully-grown woman I'd ever seen, and was alarmed to see that she was even wearing built-up soles!
She really is quite splendidly little!

Since Lisa is reputedly even shorter, she must surely qualify as a Lilliputian.

[Diane]

When I met Priscilla, I realized that she was the smallest fully-grown woman I'd ever seen, and was alarmed to see that she was even wearing built-up soles!
She really is quite splendidly little!

Since Lisa is reputedly even shorter, she must surely qualify as a Lilliputian.

Now I'm feeling quite tall in comparison.

Diane

[EnigmaticSun]

Nice beaver!

She just had it stuffed.

It's a gag from her Naked Gun appearance. Good stuff.

[Teddy]

It's a gag from her Naked Gun appearance.

I know the one
Makes me wish I was a taxidermist.

[debtdbruno]

you're a right scream Teddy................LOL

[KPM]

Wonderful

[mistymorning]

I know the one
Makes me wish I was a taxidermist.

[Getlo]

3. Lionel Ritchie's wife is indirectly responsible for the illegally administered procedure which has temporarily compromised Cilla's facial beauty.

Try permanently.

[Teddy]

Try permanently.

There appears to have been a gentle improvement in the last 12 months.
I remain optimistic that her visage will return to its former glory in the fullness of time.
It's all I have to cling to

[Donut]

I have been so wrong all this time... there has been a huge conspiracy against her all her life . Poor little rich girl...

[Albert]

lol I like this topic, thanks

It's a nice bright light on this matter

[Teddy]

Thanks

[Teddy]

I have been so wrong all this time... there has been a huge conspiracy against her all her life .

I knew you'd see the light eventually.

[Donut]

[Getlo]

There appears to have been a gentle improvement in the last 12 months.
I remain optimistic that her visage will return to its former glory in the fullness of time.
It's all I have to cling to

Good luck with that, then.

[jadedragon61]

Well, man, I never really wanted to know anything about Priscilla...

But now I know 10 things that I didn't know, and still don't want to know...

I'll try to forgot.