Do you think Vernon was a good role model?

[MissyM]

There seems to be so much importance these days put on parental role models. So I got to thinking what good things Elvis learned from Vernon. Or possibly (depending on your opinions) that he may not have been the best role model????

[Teddy]

It's an interesting question, since Gladys is usually given the credit for so much of his morality and good nature while Vernon is often portrayed as the surly, work-shy, check-forging womanizer.

[utmom2008]

It's an interesting question, since Gladys is usually given the credit for so much of his morality and good nature while Vernon is often portrayed as the surly, work-shy, check-forging womanizer.

Well......maybe not surly.;);):lol:

[KPM]

Well he forged the check which got him prison time and it left Gladys and Elvis alone for a good period. I'm sure it was common knowledge in Tupelo (like most small towns everyone know everyones business) so I'm sure Elvis had to hear a few snide remarks about it in the years they were in Tupelo.
That had to make an impression on a young kid. It also had to strip away at the secure feeling that parents are suppose to give to their kids. From most accounts I have read Vernon was not always the best provider and he had little drive to advance. So I would say he could have been a better example maybe.

[Diane]

I don't feel that Vernon was a bad man but he was a weak man. He was not a good example of what a father should be. I'm sure Elvis learned his womanizing ways from his dad. If dad does it, it must not be so bad etc.

One thing I wish Vernon could have instilled in his son was a little more of his penny pinching attitude. Had Elvis not spent so much all through his career, he wouldn't have had to work so much and the estate would not have been in such sad shape when he died. It may even be possible that he may have lived longer without such a grueling schedule of performances in that the drugs may not have been so important to keep him going.

Diane

[KPM]

I don't feel that Vernon was a bad man but he was a weak man. He was not a good example of what a father should be. I'm sure Elvis learned his womanizing ways from his dad. If dad does it, it must not be so bad etc.

One thing I wish Vernon could have instilled in his son was a little more of his penny pinching attitude. Had Elvis not spent so much all through his career, he wouldn't have had to work so much and the estate would not have been in such sad shape when he died. It may even be possible that he may have lived longer without such a grueling schedule of performances in that the drugs may not have been so important to keep him going.

Diane
You got that right-but sometimes people end up subconsciously doing the exact extreme of what they saw and maybe Vernons penny pinching is why Elvis was so over the top in his spending habits.

[Teddy]

I guess Elvis's recklessness with money may have been a reaction to his father's austerity.

[john carpenter]

I don't feel that Vernon was a bad man but he was a weak man. He was not a good example of what a father should be. I'm sure Elvis learned his womanizing ways from his dad. If dad does it, it must not be so bad etc.

One thing I wish Vernon could have instilled in his son was a little more of his penny pinching attitude. Had Elvis not spent so much all through his career, he wouldn't have had to work so much and the estate would not have been in such sad shape when he died. It may even be possible that he may have lived longer without such a grueling schedule of performances in that the drugs may not have been so important to keep him going.

DianeI couldn't agree more Diane..great reply!

[SleepyJack]

It`s easy to see everything clearly after all this time...and some of you may have valid points..and yes things may have been different had Vernon been a stronger character......but it`s like so many of the "What ifs" in the Elvis story...at the end of the day they were who they were and what happened cannot be changed. I wouldn`t critisize Vernon for his lack of ambition or for some of the poor decisions he made....we all have our own particular weaknesses and faults...towards the end of his life Elvis always seemed proud to have his father join him on stage and they seemed happy enough together...that is more than a lot of people get from relationships with their parents......I think both Elvis and Vernon did as well as they could at the time in an extraordinary set of circumstances.

[shelley.m.]

It`s easy to see everything clearly after all this time...and some of you may have valid points..and yes things may have been different had Vernon been a stronger character......but it`s like so many of the "What ifs" in the Elvis story...at the end of the day they were who they were and what happened cannot be changed. I wouldn`t critisize Vernon for his lack of ambition or for some of the poor decisions he made....we all have our own particular weaknesses and faults...towards the end of his life Elvis always seemed proud to have his father join him on stage and they seemed happy enough together...that is more than a lot of people get from relationships with their parents......I think both Elvis and Vernon did as well as they could at the time in an extraordinary set of circumstances.

Very well said,SleepyJack.

[kathy parkinson]

It`s easy to see everything clearly after all this time...and some of you may have valid points..and yes things may have been different had Vernon been a stronger character......but it`s like so many of the "What ifs" in the Elvis story...at the end of the day they were who they were and what happened cannot be changed. I wouldn`t critisize Vernon for his lack of ambition or for some of the poor decisions he made....we all have our own particular weaknesses and faults...towards the end of his life Elvis always seemed proud to have his father join him on stage and they seemed happy enough together...that is more than a lot of people get from relationships with their parents......I think both Elvis and Vernon did as well as they could at the time in an extraordinary set of circumstances.

Great reply, totally agree with you.

[Diane]

I also agree, faults or no, Elvis and Vernon still had a closeness and that in the end is all that really matters.

Diane

[Unchained Melody]

Well I see its easy to sit here so many here's later and judge one mans actions for what he did, such as Vernon writing the bad check. Of course its not what you would want a "role model" to do, but think of it like this, he was a poor man trying to raise his new family during the great depression nonetheless, I don't think he was worried about being a role model but trying to keep his head above water.

I do though think he was a lazy man, but did his best to support his family, we all know how vernon was tight with a dollar. I have nothing against ol vern. He always seemed to stay in the background quiet...

[hounddog]

The forged the check which sent him to jail I've always seen as an act of desperation with just a little stupidity. I think he saw it as a way to get money and didn't think of any consequences. He did his time and i think he learned his lesson. And i think that was passed onto Elvis.

[hounddog]

whoops that went up before i was finisihed.

I think like all of us Vernon made a mistake, we've all made blunders, bad decissions and later regretted it, it's just his mistake resulted in jail time.

[Unchained Melody]

The forged the check which sent him to jail I've always seen as an act of desperation with just a little stupidity. I think he saw it as a way to get money and didn't think of any consequences. He did his time and i think he learned his lesson. And i think that was passed onto Elvis.

Highlighted with what I agree with here.(y)

[Brian]

I do not know if Vernon was a good role model or not but it seems Elvis turned out okay.

[KPM]

It`s easy to see everything clearly after all this time...and some of you may have valid points..and yes things may have been different had Vernon been a stronger character......but it`s like so many of the "What ifs" in the Elvis story...at the end of the day they were who they were and what happened cannot be changed. I wouldn`t critisize Vernon for his lack of ambition or for some of the poor decisions he made....we all have our own particular weaknesses and faults...towards the end of his life Elvis always seemed proud to have his father join him on stage and they seemed happy enough together...that is more than a lot of people get from relationships with their parents......I think both Elvis and Vernon did as well as they could at the time in an extraordinary set of circumstances.
You are correct. (y)

[Donut]

I think they were very close and that's enough to me. You can see Vernon in many pictures and footage always by Elvis side while on tour, the army or during the movie years.

[Teddy]

The thing which we're failing to address here (and I don't necessarily agree with this) is the popular contention that Vernon was one of the most shameless exploiters of Elvis. How do we feel about this?
It seems that whenever biographers want to paint a dark picture of ol' Vern, they focus on his determination to control Elvis's money and his inclination to take advantage of the generous female attention within his son's orbit.

Most of the material which we can use to assess Vernon's character has been accumulated in the years since Elvis was firmly established as the Presley family's 'cash cow'. Consequently, it becomes more difficult to judge Vernon with confidence, since almost everybody is compelled to behave unnaturally in the presence of fame- even when it's a family member.
Unfortunately, most of what we know about Vernon before Elvis's superstardom is hearsay and pretty depressing too.

The Christian side of Elvis compelled him to forgive, so we can only learn so much about Vernon from seeing their closeness later in life. As Elvis's health deteriorated they seemed closer than ever, which is only natural.

I guess the thing I'm wondering is, do we like Vernon?
Or are we simply tolerating him because we love Elvis?

[Ronn]

He may not be the best father or role model, but I think he did the best he can at that time.

[Getlo]

Elvis certainly inherited his ideas about women from Vernon.

Ol' Vern put it about a bit when he was married to Dee, and later on. And, if the rumours are to be believed, he wasn't faithful to Gladys either.

As the British might put it, he was a notorious swordsman.

[Donut]

As the British might put it, he was a notorious swordsman.

:supriced::lmfao:

[presley31]

It`s easy to see everything clearly after all this time...and some of you may have valid points..and yes things may have been different had Vernon been a stronger character......but it`s like so many of the "What ifs" in the Elvis story...at the end of the day they were who they were and what happened cannot be changed. I wouldn`t critisize Vernon for his lack of ambition or for some of the poor decisions he made....we all have our own particular weaknesses and faults...towards the end of his life Elvis always seemed proud to have his father join him on stage and they seemed happy enough together...that is more than a lot of people get from relationships with their parents......I think both Elvis and Vernon did as well as they could at the time in an extraordinary set of circumstances.

great post Jack (y)(y)

[utmom2008]

Ol' Vern put it about a bit when he was married to Dee, and later on.
As the British might put it, he was a notorious swordsman.

:lmfao::lmfao: :notworthy :lmfao::lmfao:

[KPM]

The thing which we're failing to address here (and I don't necessarily agree with this) is the popular contention that Vernon was one of the most shameless exploiters of Elvis. How do we feel about this?
It seems that whenever biographers want to paint a dark picture of ol' Vern, they focus on his determination to control Elvis's money and his inclination to take advantage of the generous female attention within his son's orbit.

Most of the material which we can use to assess Vernon's character has been accumulated in the years since Elvis was firmly established as the Presley family's 'cash cow'. Consequently, it becomes more difficult to judge Vernon with confidence, since almost everybody is compelled to behave unnaturally in the presence of fame- even when it's a family member.
Unfortunately, most of what we know about Vernon before Elvis's superstardom is hearsay and pretty depressing too.

The Christian side of Elvis compelled him to forgive, so we can only learn so much about Vernon from seeing their closeness later in life. As Elvis's health deteriorated they seemed closer than ever, which is only natural.

I guess the thing I'm wondering is, do we like Vernon?
Or are we simply tolerating him because we love Elvis?
Vernons penny pinching is probably a direct result of how poor they were until Elvis hit it big. He lived through the great depression and many people were shaded for life who saw first hand how bad things could become. In rural areas it was even harder. My grandfather use to tell me of those days and he was also a "waste not want not" type of guy. (Which is not a bad way to live) Hunger and true hardship of any great length of time is never forgotten.
I do not dislike Vernon, he had his flaws-who does not. People are complicated, life is complicated-and he was who he was. He could maybe not be considered a good role model-yet still have good qualitities and points.

[Diane]

I'm sure you are right about Vernon becoming a penny pincher because of the earlier poverty. Also that he did have some good qualities and I think he loved his son very much just not able to show it as much as Gladys did.

Diane

[presley31]

i really don't think vernon was that great in being a role parent, but not to many people are no matter who you are or what you teach your children, being a parent will come with flaws and mistakes and regrets on how you handled things and lot of the times the children came out great and doing wonderful things with there lives. yes vernon was tight with money, but that comes with with being poor.

[Getlo]

Vernons penny pinching is probably a direct result of how poor they were until Elvis hit it big.

My father is the same way. He is 87, and grew up desperately poor during The Depression on the streets of Sydney.

He keeps every bit of paper for scrap; always writes on both sides of a piece of paper or letter, and even splits two-ply toilet paper in half so it lasts longer. Uses teabags twice. Things like that.

It's ingrained.

[utmom2008]

My father is the same way. He is 87, and grew up desperately poor during The Depression on the streets of Sydney.

He keeps every bit of paper for scrap; always writes on both sides of a piece of paper or letter, and even splits two-ply toilet paper in half so it lasts longer. Uses teabags twice. Things like that.

It's ingrained.

Yes it is, you are right about that. My mom is 88 and remembers the Great Depression well. She is afraid that's where this country is headed again and keeps telling me that no one can imagine what it's like if they haven't lived through one.:blush::blink::blush::blush:

[Unchained Melody]

There's no reason for us to dislike Vernon imo. Never did anything that I see that would make any of us dislike him.

[midnight]

I always liked Vernon. I think he did well with the circumstances in his life. He grew up and was very poor during his young adulthood. Then to be thrown into a life of money and fame had to be such a big adjustment! He never caused any trouble for Elvis or the media and was always there to support his son! Not many stars today have their dad by their side during press conferences or their concerts.They seemed to be very proud of each other! I think that speaks a lot for their father son relationship.

[Diane]

Yes I like it too that Vernon was by his son's side so much of the time. There may have been some normal friction between the two of them but it's obvious that they both cared a lot. I think they did darn good staying close like that with the lifestyle they were thrown into.

Diane

[utmom2008]

I always liked Vernon. I think he did well with the circumstances in his life. He grew up and was very poor during his young adulthood. Then to be thrown into a life of money and fame had to be such a big adjustment! He never caused any trouble for Elvis or the media and was always there to support his son! Not many stars today have their dad by their side during press conferences or their concerts.They seemed to be very proud of each other! I think that speaks a lot for their father son relationship.


Yes I like it too that Vernon was by his son's side so much of the time. There may have been some normal friction between the two of them but it's obvious that they both cared a lot. I think they did darn good staying close like that with the lifestyle they were thrown into.

Diane

Two GREAT posts!!(y)(y)(y)(y)

[Teddy]

Vernons penny pinching is probably a direct result of how poor they were until Elvis hit it big. He lived through the great depression and many people were shaded for life who saw first hand how bad things could become. In rural areas it was even harder. My grandfather use to tell me of those days and he was also a "waste not want not" type of guy. (Which is not a bad way to live) Hunger and true hardship of any great length of time is never forgotten.
I do not dislike Vernon, he had his flaws-who does not. People are complicated, life is complicated-and he was who he was. He could maybe not be considered a good role model-yet still have good qualitities and points.

I totally agree- I was playing 'devil's advocate' for the sake of the debate.
My grandparents were exactly the same and my parents aren't much different either.

[Unchained Melody]

I think they were very close and that's enough to me. You can see Vernon in many pictures and footage always by Elvis side while on tour, the army or during the movie years.

Yeah I think he was always supportive of his boy and very proud of him and was always there to support him.

No doubt though how he was a man ***** though to put it bluntly :lmfao:

[MissyM]

Well liking him and thinking if he was or wasn't a good role model are two different things. Yes, he was a penny pincher, but he didn't mind spending money on himself and his women. To say he never did anything to hurt Elvis is not true. I'm not saying some things he did were intentional. But there were things done that were not in Elvis's best interest. Like bringing Dee Stanley and boys into Elvis's life and home.
For the most part I think he tried to be a good father, but the way he was with women was not part of being a good role model. It's weird to me to that while he had no problem with Elvis working hard, he himself when Elvis was young, never held those ethics for himself. He happened into working hard because Elvis became so famous. I'm not saying he was a bad role model completely. But I do feel that it was Gladys who had the most positive role influence on Elvis.

[presley31]

Since l wasn't around to see vernon and elvis relationship, it would be unfair for me to say he was a bad role model, but like donut said seeing them pretty close is enough for me to place my opinions on.

[Diane]

I don't doubt that Gladys had the most positive influence on Elvis but I do feel that Elvis also loved his dad very much and that Vernon loved his son in his own way.

There are no perfect parents.

Diane

[presley31]

I don't doubt that Gladys had the most positive influence on Elvis but I do feel that Elvis also loved his dad very much and that Vernon loved his son in his own way.

There are no perfect parents.

Diane

You are so right there diane, there isn't any prefect parents, but as parents we try hard to make right choices.

[KPM]

Yes it is, you are right about that. My mom is 88 and remembers the Great Depression well. She is afraid that's where this country is headed again and keeps telling me that no one can imagine what it's like if they haven't lived through one.:blush::blink::blush::blush:
It is not out of the realm of possibility the US & worlds economy are a house of cards. the wrong card pulled could bring it all down. Scary to say the least!:blush: