Elvis' Mother

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

I often hear people comment that Elvis never really got over the death of his mother! I am at a loss as to why people would use this in a statement.

Perhaps they think his sad demise was partly to blame for his untimely death?

Perhaps they think if she was still around he wouldn't have taken drugs?

Perhaps they think he spent a lot of time brooding about her passing?

I'm not sure anybody really gets over the loss of someone very close and important in their life, however from what I can ascertain from Elvis' life, yes he suffered like most people do, but he seemed to get on with his life just as Vernon did.

I don't see people link the successes in Elvis' life to his mother.

The fact that Elvis' life was cut short seems to me not directly linked to the loss of his mother :hmm:

So I guess what I would like to know is why do people think he never got over the loss of his mother and was this loss any more fundamental than anybody who has lost their mother?

[SleepyJack]

I don`t think his mothers death can be directly seen as the reason for his early death or anything quite so dramatic as that.....nor do I think he was in some way obsessive about his mother,as many people have said over the years....I do think however that her death did have a huge impact on him as a person and on the person he became eventually....on his attitude to death and even to life..as it does with many people.I think many of his insecurities and fears began when he lost Gladys and with it her strength and support.

[Donut]

I have no idea why some think it was that way either but I have noticed that many fans have constructed their ideal Elvis based on their own needs (not exclusively in this matter)... I don´t know if it makes sense to you but that´s what I think.

[Getlo]

I often hear people comment that Elvis never really got over the death of his mother! I am at a loss as to why people would use this in a statement.

As am I.

As I have said previously, one never gets fully over the death of a parent. But you find a way through it, so that it becomes a regrettable but natural part of your own existence.

Elvis, quite clearly, found that. How else could he have moved on to the later part of his life and career, which was - for the most part - filled with success and general happiness?

Elvis died nineteen years after Gladys. Yes, it was an awful blow, but one from which he recovered eventually.

[presley31]

Elvis losing his mother was very hard on him, but i don't really think it has much to do with elvis death. Elvis was taking gladys pills when she was alive so I don't really know if gladys know about that at the time, but l do believe if she lived she might have more control over his drug use and maybe she might of been the only person who could of stood up to her son and made him listern.

[Diane]

I voted no. I agree, I don't think the death of his mother had anything to do with his own death. I think he took his mother's death very hard but he did get through it. You never stop missing a loved one but time does help.

Diane

[Kentucky Rain]

He was born in the belly of the country
Over east of Eden
Confused by the big city blues
He didn't know whose life he's leading
Put yourself behind the wheel
See if you can get that feel
Move faster by night
Move faster by night
The windows were all shattered
And the body was all battered

American Roulette
Stake your life upon it
American Roulette
Same eyes, same eyes
American Roulette

Take that body and put him in a mansion
Paint the window black
Give him all the women that he wants
Put a monkey on his back
All of your so called friends
Take you where the sidewalk ends
Can't sleep at night
Can't sleep at night
Lord please save his soul
He was the king of Rock and Roll

American Roulette
Stake your life upon it
American Roulette
Same eyes, same eyes
American Roulette

They said she didn't have a chance in hell
For the American Dream
There's a thousand young blondes out there
Trying to make it to the silver screen
She had the walk, the look, the talk
That shook the world (Read about it)
Some like it hot
Some like it cool
Too much to her to handle
Another scandal, she burnt the candle

American Roulette
Stake your life upon it
American Roulette
Same eyes, same eyes
American Roulette

Say a prayer for the lost generation
Who spin the wheel out of desperation

American Roulette
Stake your life upon it
American Roulette
Same eyes, same eyes
American Roulette

I voted yes ..not because he wouldn't/couldn't get over the passing of his mother..but because I think there was lack of guidance from early on. Will never know if Glady's being alive would have changed anything.

The above song describes the thoughts of Robbie Robertson in regards to three artists who passed at an early age.

[Broussey]

The ONLY reason i said yes was because IMO i feel that if she was alive i think she would be the only one to get him off the meds he was taking...... IMO!!!!!!!!!!

Other than that yes you never get over a mothers death i think in that aspect he got through his sadness with the Gospel

[john carpenter]

I voted no..because as other posts state Elvis died 19 years and two days after Gladys. And after she died he had to go back to Germany. I believe he felt the loss more after he returned from the Army in 1960. He had more time to grieve. But he was thrown right back into the movies. Yes, he aventually was able to cope with the loss. But no one really gets over the death of a parent/child. As with Vernon, he died less than two years after Elvis, i think that loss sped up his already failing health.:'(:'(

[Sonny]

I also believe that if his mother had not passed away when she did, she would have been of more influence during the years that followed.

And yes, she might have been the person he would have listened to with regards to his way of life.

But it's just guessing I'm afraid.

I think he got over her death, as most young people do in their own way when a parent passes.

But fact remains, she had more influence over him then Vernon for sure.

Sonny

[kathy parkinson]

As am I.

As I have said previously, one never gets fully over the death of a parent. But you find a way through it, so that it becomes a regrettable but natural part of your own existence.

Elvis, quite clearly, found that. How else could he have moved on to the later part of his life and career, which was - for the most part - filled with success and general happiness?

Elvis died nineteen years after Gladys. Yes, it was an awful blow, but one from which he recovered eventually.

Agree with Getlo, he said everything i would have said, i miss my parents, but i go on with my life, living the way they raised me.

[Kentucky Rain]

I agree that she could have been one who could have helped him with the drug usage as long as he was willing to help himself. I also would like to think she would have encouraged him to "slow down" in all aspects of his living. To be placed (willingly or not) on his schedule (performances, records etc.etc.) at the age of 21 is to me the beginning of a downward spiral. Tho, I've only listened to the music of Elvis for two years or so and have read a few books, my thoughts of how he was treated reminds me of a race~horse...faster..faster..win..win.

He went along with it..probably enjoyed much of it (for a period of time) because he knew no difference afterawhile (age 21 again). I just feel he was exploited.(didn't know what normalcy really was).........which is sad.

[utmom2008]

As am I.

As I have said previously, one never gets fully over the death of a parent. But you find a way through it, so that it becomes a regrettable but natural part of your own existence.

I agree with Getlo on this one. It's a part of life, a natural part that ultimately shapes us as we grow older. After I became a parent I really understood the natural course that should happen. Losing a parent is devastating, but parents that have to bury a child is unthinkable.
Until I married and later had a son, my father and Elvis were the two men that I loved most in the world. They have both been gone a long long time, and I'm sure in some way that has shaped who I am today.:sad::sad:

[LianaKaralivanou]

As am I.

As I have said previously, one never gets fully over the death of a parent. But you find a way through it, so that it becomes a regrettable but natural part of your own existence.

Elvis, quite clearly, found that. How else could he have moved on to the later part of his life and career, which was - for the most part - filled with success and general happiness?

Elvis died nineteen years after Gladys. Yes, it was an awful blow, but one from which he recovered eventually.


That's a big day, guys. I COMPLETELY agree with Getlo on this one. I couldn't have said it better myself. I, too lost my father almost 3 years ago and I don't think I got fully over it and maybe I will never get fully over it but somehow I managed to go on with my life. And that's the right thing to do. You mustn't get stuck with the past because you miss the present. And it's not that Elvis died right after his mother's death to say something like that. He died 19 years later for God's sake!

[utmom2008]

You mustn't get stuck with the past because you miss the present. And it's not that Elvis died right after his mother's death to say something like that. He died 19 years later for God's sake!

Well said Liana.(y)(y) My father has been gone a little over 18 years...I can't imagine blaming any of my problems on "never getting past my father's death".:blink::blink:

[Diane]

I agree, I lost both my parents at a relatively young age. My mother was only 53 and dad 67...both sudden deaths which were shocking but then I was happy neither suffered. I still miss them every day and there are a lot of times I wish they were still around to share something with....you know the "Mom would have loved this, Dad would have loved that". No doubt Elvis felt the same about his mom.

Diane

[Suspicious Minds]

Elvis is happy with His parents. Even Gladys looks happy.

[Unchained Melody]

Elvis is happy with His parents. Even Gladys looks happy.

Ok and your point is ? :hmm:

Of course he was able to live without her he went almost 20 years after she died living..so I don't see how you can blame her death for the death of him. Sure he thought about it quiet often and missed her badly but I don't think that killed him...theres so many other reasons to blame for that then Glady's death..I still find Elvis' happiest days was after she died..with the birth of Lisa, coming back in '69 on stage, the Aloha performance etc.

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

Looking at the results thus far:-

Is Elvis' Loss Of Mother Fundamental To His Death

Yes - 18 Votes

No - 14 Votes

There are clearly a higher percentage of people who believe that Elvis' death was effected by his mothers death.... However the people who have posted in this thread seem to reflect the No vote.

The question you have to ask based on the vote so far is.... How and why did Gladys passing directly contribute to Elvis'?

[Unchained Melody]

Matt I don't think it contributed directly to Elvis' demise but I think it brought him down sometimes in the end of his life when he knew he reached a point there was no return..like in some movies like Kurt Russels Elvis 1979 film where Elvis would talk to his mom and twin brother saying he would be seeing them soon, and how he often said he wouldn't make it long past 40....:hmm:

[utmom2008]

I still find Elvis' happiest days was after she died..with the birth of Lisa, coming back in '69 on stage, the Aloha performance etc.

Elvis may have been happy while he was actually on the stage in Hawaii, but I don't see how you could think the days leading up to the concert were anywhere close to the happiest days for him. Take a look at the AFH press conference's from September and November of '72, and then tell me that's a happy man.:blush: The same happy man that was stoned out of his mind the day after AFH. He was right in the middle of a divorce and the drugs were flowing. Not a happy time at all I suspect.:blink::blush:

[utmom2008]

like in some movies like Kurt Russels Elvis 1979 film where Elvis would talk to his mom and twin brother saying he would be seeing them soon, and how he often said he wouldn't make it long past 40....:hmm:

How do we actually know that Elvis sat around talking to his twin brother??:doh: I always thought that was highly suspect.:blink::blush:

[Unchained Melody]

Well I guess should have said during the Aloha concert...my apologies.:blush:

I still don't know why people think he was stoned out of his mind during that interview..i just never thought he was when I seen it...

[Getlo]

I still don't know why people think he was stoned out of his mind during that interview..i just never thought he was when I seen it...

Let's not get this thread off track with this discussion. It's been done to death elsewhere.

As for the Aloha press conferences ... he was absolutely flying, especially during the November one (black jacket). So sad to see.

But I suppose had Gladys not died when she did, she would have been able to kick his arse when it was most sorely needed. And it was needed a lot later on!

[franny]

I voted no. I agree, I don't think the death of his mother had anything to do with his own death. I think he took his mother's death very hard but he did get through it. You never stop missing a loved one but time does help.

Diane

I agree, Diane. I also voted no.

I think Elvis learned to deal with it as best he could at the time, as anyone does, when they lose a parent...

I think time helped and he moved on with his life, but I wouldn't say her death affected his "whole" life..

franny

[shelley.m.]

I do think that Gladys kept Elvis pretty well "grounded" after he hit the big-time.She was always there for him.I know that she couldn't handle all of Elvis' fame and she feared that she was losing her one and only son to the pressures of show bussiness and saw less and less of him,how much can a mother take?

[Kentucky Rain]

As for the Aloha press conferences ... he was absolutely flying, especially during the November one (black jacket). So sad to see.

Is the press conference on the Aloha dvds? I have it, but do not recall seeing him in an interview.

[Unchained Melody]

As for the Aloha press conferences ... he was absolutely flying, especially during the November one (black jacket). So sad to see.

Is the press conference on the Aloha dvds? I have it, but do not recall seeing him in an interview.

No it's not on the Aloha dvdset.

[Unchained Melody]

But I suppose had Gladys not died when she did, she would have been able to kick his arse when it was most sorely needed. And it was needed a lot later on!

You are right Getlo. I think if anyone had any chance whatsoever at getting Elvis to change his ways it would've or could've been Gladys.

[utmom2008]

This is the one from 09/72....


D5gCxCcoD48

[utmom2008]

This is 11/72...


OT3q7gclLz8

[Unchained Melody]

Thank you for posting that Rosanne!!(y)

[Kentucky Rain]

Thank you for posting the youtube videos. Presently my computer won't let me view youtube. Looking at the front picture from 9/72 and 11/72, he appears to have "aged" so much. Thank you again.

[hounddog]

I don't know if Gladys could have got him off the meds. Didn't Gladys have her own issues with uppers? Or a stimlulant used for weight loss?

I don't think Gladys death 18 years earlier resulted in Elvis death in 1977

[Unchained Melody]

I don't know if Gladys could have got him off the meds. Didn't Gladys have her own issues with uppers? Or a stimlulant used for weight loss?

I don't think Gladys death 18 years earlier resulted in Elvis death in 1977

I've heard she was a heavy drinker before her death.

[presley31]

I don't know if Gladys could have got him off the meds. Didn't Gladys have her own issues with uppers? Or a stimlulant used for weight loss?

I don't think Gladys death 18 years earlier resulted in Elvis death in 1977

i remember reading that in revelations from the mm that elvis took gladys pills and she didn't know he took them. Not sure what they were, but one was dirt pills. Yes she was a drinker.

[CRITTERGITTER]

I don't think Gladys was as strong as everyone thinks she was. He might have listened to her, but eventually he would become his own man as all men do. It's not like she died when he was a child, he was in the army. He was an adult. There are many drug addicts in this world with Mothers that beg, plead and kick their asses, but continue to do the same thing. There is no guarantee things would have been any different.

[Donut]

I think Elvis did as he pleased when Gladys was alive anyway so I don´t know if it would have made any difference, but one thing is for sure, she would have told him like it is.

[Diane]

I agree Donut, she could have given him a good case of the "guilts" though and maybe held him back a little.:)

Diane

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

I certainly believe that Gladys despite her own Issues would have been one of the only people In Elvis' life who could have told Elvis the truth without fear of losing her job ;)

[Diane]

No bets on that one:D:D:D(y)

Diane

[KPM]

I don't know if Gladys could have got him off the meds. Didn't Gladys have her own issues with uppers? Or a stimlulant used for weight loss?

I don't think Gladys death 18 years earlier resulted in Elvis death in 1977
Yes the diet pills of the 30's into the 60s were basically speed. It was perceived as safe to use-and effective.
The dangers of addiction were not deemed so bad until the 60s.

[KPM]

I certainly believe that Gladys despite her own Issues would have been one of the only people In Elvis' life who could have told Elvis the truth without fear of losing her job ;)
You have to truely respect someone "in order to really listen" when they advise you.IMO
I think he had total respect for his Mom. I think he had a respect for Parker. I don't think he had that kind of respect for many (including Vernon) so I think he would have worried more about what his mom thought and listened to her more.

[Merry]

How can you respect/listen to people who are partying and are worse?

[Kentucky Rain]

What are dirt pills?

[Diane]

:lmfao: She meant diet pills. :lmfao: Jen is good with typos :lmfao:

Diane

[Kentucky Rain]

Ok, thank you.

[utmom2008]

What are dirt pills?


:lmfao: She meant diet pills. :lmfao: Jen is good with typos :lmfao:

Diane

I saw the "dirt pills" comment earlier today and I wondered if that was going to confuse people.:lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

It's a new diet technique here in the US...if you start to feel hungry - just eat a teaspoon of "dirt" and it takes the hunger away.(y)

[hounddog]

I agree that Gladys would have had no fear of telling Elvis how it was, no matter how much he respected her i just don't think he would have listened. Pills were seen much differently then than they are today.

They were prescribed, i think that was what the real crux of the problem was.

[Unchained Melody]

How can you respect/listen to people who are partying and are worse?

What 'people' are you referring to...you mean why listen to the MM when they were taking pills and partying along side Elvis..:hmm:I'm confused:blush:

[Unchained Melody]

I certainly believe that Gladys despite her own Issues would have been one of the only people In Elvis' life who could have told Elvis the truth without fear of losing her job ;)

Right on with that Matt...Elvis was the same way when telling people how things were and how they were going to be...

[MissyM]

The word "worse" when referring to the MM, is opinion not fact. None of them died from drug addictions. And if you are going to go there, then nothing Elvis ever said is the truth either.
Just because a person takes drugs does not mean that everything they say is hogwash. A person/their words are still of value. Matter of fact for years they have been have held such value that they are constantly used as references and fans rely on many of them.

[presley31]

What are dirt pills?

diet pills and thanks diane and rosanne for correcting me:blush: Yep me is the pro for typos but you now its me:P

[utmom2008]

diet pills and thanks diane and rosanne for correcting me:blush: Yep me is the pro for typos but you now its me:P

No problem Jen.(y) The dirt pills post was funny!:D(y)

[TotallyInsane]

Well shoot, I was already googling dirt pills - thought it might be the latest and greatest way to lose weight!! :lmfao::lmfao:

[utmom2008]

Well shoot, I was already googling dirt pills - thought it might be the latest and greatest way to lose weight!! :lmfao::lmfao:

:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:

[presley31]

Look at that there is a dirt pill that children with asthma can take, wow you learn something new everyday, but IMO the dirt pills regrading elvis was funny.

http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/printfriendly/0,4139,105753,00.html

[franny]

Well shoot, I was already googling dirt pills - thought it might be the latest and greatest way to lose weight!! :lmfao::lmfao:

If only it was that easy! :lol:

franny

[Diane]

Wow Jen, you must have known subconsciously that there were dirt pills. Wonder if they really worked?

In any case, you made my day with your "typo".:lol:

Diane

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

The word "worse" when referring to the MM, is opinion not fact. None of them died from drug addictions. And if you are going to go there, then nothing Elvis ever said is the truth either.
Just because a person takes drugs does not mean that everything they say is hogwash. A person/their words are still of value. Matter of fact for years they have been have held such value that they are constantly used as references and fans rely on many of them.

Good point, I often have thought about how all the guys held it together if they were in fact "worse" than Elvis!! I can only extrapolate that what Jess means is their behaviours were "worse" than Elvis' ;)

[Unchained Melody]

Good point, I often have thought about how all the guys held it together if they were in fact "worse" than Elvis!! I can only extrapolate that what Jess means is their behaviours were "worse" than Elvis' ;)

Well seeing as how they are still with us today for them to have been worse than Elvis then they must have special powers or something..come on i dont believe that, someone like lamar fike one of the few who would talk to elvis about taht stuff when he was taking demerol and lamar said elvis do you know what your taking..that stuff is for cancer patients..and elvis said something along the lines of i need it tahts all that matters and if you say one more GD thing about it i'll break you or something...read that in Down at the end of lonely street book...so it sounds to me from what i've read and heard that elvis most obviously worse in this stuff..

[Unchained Melody]

The word "worse" when referring to the MM, is opinion not fact. None of them died from drug addictions. And if you are going to go there, then nothing Elvis ever said is the truth either.
Just because a person takes drugs does not mean that everything they say is hogwash. A person/their words are still of value. Matter of fact for years they have been have held such value that they are constantly used as references and fans rely on many of them.

Agreed with you on all grounds!

[Merry]

It was worded that way to me,b by someone.

Matt, yes, that is what I meant.

In affect, oh heck. I hate all of this. Some were not taking prescription drugs, put it that way, Sonny has said it, himself. I'm sick of this pointing the finger as if we are all perfect.

Certainly, no-one will take advice from someone who is taking worse things.

They were young men having fun, and it went wrong, they learnt from it, like we all do. It's what makes us, us. People with life experience, people with empathy. People who care. There aren't many around.

Milly, I don't EVER refer to Billy. I am only replying here, because of Elvis, I'm sick of this pulling him apart. It feels like it is daily.

Would anyone here pull apart their loved ones?

[Unchained Melody]

It was worded that way to me,b by someone.

Matt, yes, that is what I meant.

In affect, oh heck. I hate all of this. Some were not taking prescription drugs, put it that way, Sonny has said it, himself. I'm sick of this pointing the finger as if we are all perfect.

Certainly, no-one will take advice from someone who is taking worse things.

They were young men having fun, and it went wrong, they learnt from it, like we all do. It's what makes us, us. People with life experience, people with empathy. People who care. There aren't many around.

Milly, I don't EVER refer to Billy. I am only replying here, because of Elvis, I'm sick of this pulling him apart. It feels like it is daily.

Would anyone here pull apart their loved ones?

No one here is pulling elvis apart...we all know that elvis made wrong choices in his life and there is nothing wrong in having a civialized discussion about the bad side of him...

And Elvis obviously never learned from it as he was the one that never admitted to being a drug addict and had himself convinced that he needed the stuff.now sure he had some problems he needed the medication for but for the most part i honestly believe elvis just loved the feeling of being numb....to bad he never learned from his problems...

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

No one here is pulling elvis apart...we all know that elvis made wrong choices in his life and there is nothing wrong in having a civialized discussion about the bad side of him...

And Elvis obviously never learned from it as he was the one that never admitted to being a drug addict and had himself convinced that he needed the stuff.now sure he had some problems he needed the medication for but for the most part i honestly believe elvis just loved the feeling of being numb....to bad he never learned from his problems...


For someone of Elvis' talent, you have to ask the question why did he self destruct in such a way?

[MissyM]

Well, I think to answer that you'd have to really get into Elvis's head as much as possible. For one thing there was a biological predisposition for distructive behavior.

Elvis's life for the most part, before fame was a simple life. It moves at a slow pace, and you just sit back and enjoy the ride. It was a time of innocence and fun. Even though Elvis's family was poor, there was a certain amount of security in the bonds that age and family bring. Hard times just solidified the bonds more. Most kids feed off of the moods of their mothers. Gladys was a gregarious/happy women in spite of challenges therefore, so was Elvis. No not perfect but generally happy. While his mother was protective in some ways, he still was given freedom to explore and be creative, (that was encouraged, and have fun.
Then your world starts turning at a pace that you are not used too. This happens at a time that most young men are still trying to find out who they are. Who you are for Elvis becomes defined very much by the public image and one thing...his music. Some relationships become defined by your fame.
But you are still going through all the changes, moods, and things that happen to a normal young man. Your family has deaths, your parents argue, you fall in and out of love. Yet, there is the other side to your life that seems to not give you the time to progress through those things as your would with out fame. Listen to other child stars talk about this phenomenon.
Then you are taken away from the one person who offers the most stability, and happiness. (the Army) It's like suddenly ripping a security blanket from a 2 year old. It's a crisis folks.
But none the less, you do it with dignity and accept the inevitable again, with out being able to fully embrace the emotions it causes.
Then that anchor, is dropped (mother dies) and will never be there again.
By this time you are finding some things that make it all easier to cope with. How easy to turn to those things such as drugs, females, and friends/partying. I have been in this place with the knowledge of a predisposion to abuse. Thank God, I didn't dare going there. I would have ended up like him.
So the pattern is set, and you never ever really get the breathing room to deal with life's pace and heartaches, like a normal person would. Much is heaped on you, one person. The need to own your creativity (something that was precious) had to be given over to another, because by then, you and others depended so much on it as a comodity. Relationships fail and you can't seem to find fullfillment in them. And the less your needs are met, the easier it is to turn to the one thing that makes it all a bit easier.
Now it's like a snowball going down hill. You've not coped and dealt with so much for so long, not really found yourself in the way you needed to,and learned to just get by from day to day as best you can.
Your world is surreal, and as hard as you look for the real you in it, you can't because you have carried around so much baggage from this life, you are weighted down, and just don't have the strength to lift the baggage off and take the time to just be that person you once were.

[Diane]

Great post Missy!(y) I agree 100%. Being Elvis wasn't the fun ride a lot of people think. Too much too fast for one that loved the simple things in life and could no longer find or have the time to enjoy them.

Diane

[Getlo]

For one thing there was a biological predisposition for distructive behavior.

The scientific jury is still out on this sort of thing. There is no addicton gene, for instance. Life is all about choices. Elvis made his. I'd be interested in any data that shows a direct correlation between addictive parents and their offspring.


Then you are taken away from the one person who offers the most stability, and happiness. (the Army) It's like suddenly ripping a security blanket from a 2 year old. It's a crisis folks.

A lot of young men were drafted. A security blanket from a two-year-old? Please, Elvis was 23 when he went in ... a grown man.


Then that anchor, is dropped (mother dies) and will never be there again.

Lots of people lose a parent at such an age, and younger. This is not an excuse for Elvis' subsequent long-term behaviour.


By this time you are finding some things that make it all easier to cope with. How easy to turn to those things such as drugs, females, and friends/partying.

And how easy not to. Sure, in the short term, going off the rails is fine, even expected. But Elvis, smart though he was, failed to make the right choices in life.


Now it's like a snowball going down hill.

A snowball is usually out of control. A life is only out of control if the person chooses it to be.


I believe everyone is in control of their own life.

Really? Your post above would seem to completely contradict that accurate theory.

Excuses, excuses ...

[MissyM]

Getlo, yes the jury is somewhat out, you will find research that will validate the genetics and some that will not-so to each their own.

The security blanket reference was an example of a stage of life. Physcology will tell you that the terrible two are replicated in the teens. Elvis may have been 23 in numbers, but was he in mental developement?

You can not compare "a lot of men" with Elvis, unique situation, circumstances, and I was not talking about them. (also refer that to the death of his mother)

"And how easy not to. Sure, in the short term, going off the rails is fine, even expected. But Elvis, smart though he was, failed to make the right choices in life" Getlo.----Good you can say this but you were not him, you didn't live his life, so unless you had, you really don't know the easiness of that choice. I am guessing based on my experience of crisis. I am fully aware of my weaknesses.

My reference to the snowball was not linked to his life being out of control. Even a snowball can be stopped. How difficult it would have been is subjective.

In the end, yes everyone is in control of their lives. At any given time Elvis could have stopped anything (well the draft-no) but how easy would doing that have been. What would the result have been for everyone, including him, must be taken into consideration. I'm not making excuses at all. I try to understand the step by step, procession of occurances, interjecting his personhood, into my ideas.

It seems to be so cut and dry to you. For the most part, I am not like that. There are all shades to any given life.

[Diane]

I don't know if there is an addictive gene per se but it is known that certain "tendencies" are passed down and alcoholics have the tendency to pass down the chemical imbalance that makes them what they are. American Indians for instance.

Diane

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

The scientific jury is still out on this sort of thing. There is no addicton gene, for instance. Life is all about choices. Elvis made his. I'd be interested in any data that shows a direct correlation between addictive parents and their offspring.

I agree it is difficult to prove a direct correlation to addictive nature but learned habits die hard: -


It is well known that the foundations for food choice are laid down in childhood. Poor dietary habits learned in childhood may persist into adult life. The dietary awareness of children is subject to a range of complex interacting forces, for example, peer group pressure, social factors and television advertising. Many investigators have developed innovative methodologies to record these parameters. Reviews, therefore, the methodological issues of studies which have attempted to elicit pre-adolescent attitudes, knowledge and beliefs about food. Finally, makes recommendations about methodological issues that should be considered when studying pre-adolescent children’s food choice.

The link Here (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7057060.stm) shows that upbringing has a lessor part that originally thought?

One thing is for certain, there are a whole host of factors to be considered before making any judgements.

[ehollier]

The scientific jury is still out on this sort of thing. There is no addicton gene, for instance. Life is all about choices. Elvis made his....

Lots of people lose a parent at such an age, and younger. This is not an excuse for Elvis' subsequent long-term behaviour....

And how easy not to. Sure, in the short term, going off the rails is fine, even expected. But Elvis, smart though he was, failed to make the right choices in life....


I've always felt that those who suggest that Elvis was so naive that he didn't realize that he was addicted to drugs is an insult to his intelligence. Save for his lack of self-esteem or feelings of intelletual inferiority, he was capable of great understanding and perception. I believe that he was well aware of what he was doing to himself, but instead, lacked any sort of self-control to maintain a civilized lifestyle.

[Getlo]

I've always felt that those who suggest that Elvis was so naive that he didn't realize that he was addicted to drugs is an insult to his intelligence.

And you'd be completely wrong.

Not admitting to himself that he was a drug addict has nothing to do with his naivete at all.

Witness his drug-fuelled ravings from the stage in Vegas in 1974, where he swore up and down to the audience that he had never been strung out in his life.

Or his protestations to family and friends that he didn't have a problem, when clearly he did.

[Unchained Melody]

How do you know he didn't? You might be surprised.

You have some sort of insight to this ? :hmm:

[Unchained Melody]

And you'd be completely wrong.

Not admitting to himself that he was a drug addict has nothing to do with his naivete at all.

Witness his drug-fuelled ravings from the stage in Vegas in 1974, where he swore up and down to the audience that he had never been strung out in his life.

Or his protestations to family and friends that he didn't have a problem, when clearly he did.

Agreed Getlo!!!

[utmom2008]

I've always felt that those who suggest that Elvis was so naive that he didn't realize that he was addicted to drugs is an insult to his intelligence. S


And you'd be completely wrong.
Not admitting to himself that he was a drug addict has nothing to do with his naivete at all.
Witness his drug-fuelled ravings from the stage in Vegas in 1974, where he swore up and down to the audience that he had never been strung out in his life.
Or his protestations to family and friends that he didn't have a problem, when clearly he did.

I agree with Getlo 100% on this one. I assume Elizabeth that you have never had a family member addicted to prescription medication, if so you are very lucky. I have dealt with it before...as I have explained here many times about my mother-n-law. A drugstore addict NEVER thinks they are addicted to anything. That's the true power of the illness..it has you in a choke-hold and you are not even aware of it. I'm quite sure Elvis had no clue that he was in the mess that he really was.:blink::blink::blush::blush:

[ehollier]

And you'd be completely wrong.

Not admitting to himself that he was a drug addict has nothing to do with his naivete at all.

Witness his drug-fuelled ravings from the stage in Vegas in 1974, where he swore up and down to the audience that he had never been strung out in his life.

Or his protestations to family and friends that he didn't have a problem, when clearly he did.

The basis on which I made this statement is the simple fact that he had stopped taking these drugs on more than one occasion when he faced the challenges of returning to the public with a challenge. He had a temendous constitution and the power to stop taking the drugs when he set his mind to it just as he made the conscious choice to begin these drugs again when he felt like it. The Aloha concert was just one example of this.

[utmom2008]

The basis on which I made this statement is the simple fact that he had stopped taking these drugs on more than one occasion when he faced the challenges of returning to the public with a challenge. He had a temendous constitution and the power to stop taking the drugs when he set his mind to it just as he made the conscious choice to begin these drugs again when he felt like it. The Aloha concert was just one example of this.

That's part of the illness of addiction. You can stop for brief periods, which further solidifies your belief that you have all the control, NOT that the drug has control of you. It's the same for some alcoholics..they may be sober to get through a big family reunion or something where they want to prove to the others that they have NO problem. But...they too will fall off the wagon. When you have lived all of this with family members you would be surprised about some of the things pertaing to addiction. Elvis thought he was proving a BIG point to his friends and family...he stopped when he needed to didn't he? Of course...the next day he was right back at it, all the time telling himself "I don't have a problem..I stopped didn't I?":blink::blink::blush::blush:

[nyc]

For someone of Elvis' talent, you have to ask the question why did he self destruct in such a way?

What amazes me is how the same thing keeps happening. I'd think that what happened to Elvis (and to Joplin, Hendrix, Morrison, etc.) would be a lesson. But just look at Amy Winehouse now, destroying herself with drugs. She didn't even make it to 25 before she imploded.

Maybe the people drawn to performing aren't all that stable to begin with. Or maybe most people simply can't handle fame and fortune. But Elvis had a lot of company in self-destructive behavior.

[utmom2008]

How do you know he didn't? You might be surprised.


You have some sort of insight to this ? :hmm:


Do you? I don't think so. Don't remember seeing you there. Course if I did I would have you thrown out by your ear.


Yeah, you're real funny, kinda remind me of Moon. Marty, in case you didn't know.

Thanks...I'm glad that you like my humor!!(y)(y) Why did you delete the post you made where you told me to "mind my own business"?:hmm::hmm: :wacko::wacko:

[buttonhead]

Could be....

but how can you protect a man from himself ? like once Hebler said.

Elvis is a grown up man, but if Gladys still alive , she would have say something or do something to keep him away from drugs ......and Priscilla :lmfao:

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

Gladys was just as much a victim of Elvis' success as Elvis was himself, neither of them were prepared.

[buttonhead]

Yup... I agree with you Matt. as grown up poor as his mom was Elvis was famous too fast too soon.

[ehollier]

Gladys was just as much a victim of Elvis' success as Elvis was himself, neither of them were prepared.

This in addition to maybe a lack of education which led to a feeling of inferiority. Although Gladys was not educated, I think had a great deal of common sense; however, when Elvis became famous so fast, she didn't knew who to turn to or trust. I felt she always had a look of fear or inferiority in her eyes.

[utmom2008]

Although Gladys was not educated, I think had a great deal of common sense; however, when Elvis became famous so fast, she didn't knew who to turn to or trust. I felt she always had a look of fear or inferiority in her eyes.

I bet that she had alot of common sense as well. She was the one who was leary of Col. Parker after all. I always see a look of fear about her, and the more famous Elvis became the sadder she looked. I understand where she was coming from in a way. I have a 22 year old son..if he overnight became the sensation that Elvis did, it would worry me to death I think.:blush::blush:

[KPM]

Gladys was just as much a victim of Elvis' success as Elvis was himself, neither of them were prepared.
At least Elvis had youth, looks, and health on his side at the time of the success. Gladys must have felt she was not at all what a huge singing/actings stars mother should look like. The glamour and glitz of it all-she had to feel she was letting down Elvis by not being those things. The truth was IMO Elvis could have cared less that she was not those things.

[utmom2008]

Gladys must have felt she was not at all what a huge singing/actings stars mother should look like. The glamour and glitz of it all-she had to feel she was letting down Elvis by not being those things. The truth was IMO Elvis could have cared less that she was not those things.

I think you are right about that. I think she didn't want Elvis to be ashamed of her and how she looked. If she weighed 400 lbs. it would not have mattered to Elvis.:sad::sad:

[Unchained Melody]

Gladys was just as much a victim of Elvis' success as Elvis was himself, neither of them were prepared.

And that I think is where some of the fault is.

Elvis was thrown into this world of fame and fortune & all that goes along with it so fast they didn't have anything to prepare them for what lied ahead in their lives...no one really to blame, just a matter of fate.

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

And that I think is where some of the fault is.

Elvis was thrown into this world of fame and fortune & all that goes along with it so fast they didn't have anything to prepare them for what lied ahead in their lives...no one really to blame, just a matter of fate.

Looking at the fate of other stars big and small, fame is a strong aphrodisiac that is a cruel mistress/master. Few come away unscathed.

[Unchained Melody]

Looking at the fate of other stars big and small, fame is a strong aphrodisiac that is a cruel mistress/master. Few come away unscathed.

Agreed Matt...sad it happens to so many good-hearted people...(n)

[Diane]

Unfortunately that's part of the fame game. Not many come away without a few scars and quite a few lose their lives at a young age. Elvis more than many was ill equipped emotionally to handle it.

Diane

[Unchained Melody]

Unfortunately that's part of the fame game. Not many come away without a few scars and quite a few lose their lives at a young age. Elvis more than many was ill equipped emotionally to handle it.

Diane

I think he could have handled it i think it was more the fact that he simply gave up in many ways.

[Getlo]

The basis on which I made this statement is the simple fact that he had stopped taking these drugs on more than one occasion when he faced the challenges of returning to the public with a challenge. The Aloha concert was just one example of this.

Elvis was never completely free of drugs from the moment he took them in the army. So, he got clean (well, relatively straight anyway) for Aloha ... He was addicted to the stuff, plain and simple. No two ways about it.

He denied it, and you can continue to deny it. Doesn't change the fact that it is true.


Elvis was thrown into this world of fame

Partially, yes. But it was Elvis' choice to be a music star, actor etc.

[ehollier]

Elvis was never completely free of drugs from the moment he took them in the army. So, he got clean (well, relatively straight anyway) for Aloha ... He was addicted to the stuff, plain and simple. No two ways about it.

He denied it, and you can continue to deny it. Doesn't change the fact that it is true.


Getlo, I am not denying that Elvis was addicted to drugs. Quite the contrary. All I suggested is that Elvis was much smarter than many give him credit. He didn't take these drugs without the realization that he was doing serious damage to his personal and professional life. Linda Thompson says that he admited that he was self-destructive. He was quite aware of the damage he was doing to himself and his body, his family and career. Also, he, by many accounts, appeared to be a man with an unusually strong constitution who was capable of getting off drugs when the appropriate challenge was presented to him.

[Getlo]

He didn't take these drugs without the realization that he was doing serious damage to his personal and professional life.

Words genuinely fail me ... :doh:

[Donut]

I´m with you on this one ehollier. I think he was well aware of what he was doing to himself, at least in the last years of his life and that he simply denied it to those around him because admitting it meant he had to do something about it. Maybe he felt he wasn´t able of cleaning his act.

[presley31]

Getlo, I am not denying that Elvis was addicted to drugs. Quite the contrary. All I suggested is that Elvis was much smarter than many give him credit. He didn't take these drugs without the realization that he was doing serious damage to his personal and professional life. Linda Thompson says that he admited that he was self-destructive. He was quite aware of the damage he was doing to himself and his body, his family and career. Also, he, by many accounts, appeared to be a man with an unusually strong constitution who was capable of getting off drugs when the appropriate challenge was presented to him.

good points and l agree too (y)(y)

[MissyM]

Gladys did have people to turn to but what could they do? Don't forget, she had plenty to contend with other than Elvis's fame. Vernon, not an easy man to be married to. Her plate was full.

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

We seem to have gravitated to the Elvis drugs scenario rather than the original question!

Looking at the results in the poll (Is Elvis' Loss Of Mother Fundamental To His Death, 37 yes - 26 No) it suggests the fact that Elvis died because he couldn't get over the death of his mother or something other.... Am I getting this wrong?

Can someone please explain why the majority of people feel this way because I just don't understand that reasoning??!!

[presley31]

We seem to have gravitated to the Elvis drugs scenario rather than the original question!

Looking at the results in the poll (Is Elvis' Loss Of Mother Fundamental To His Death, 37 yes - 26 No) it suggests the fact that Elvis died because he couldn't get over the death of his mother or something other.... Am I getting this wrong?

Can someone please explain why the majority of people feel this way because I just don't understand that reasoning??!!

agree JJ I really can't understand why some feel that way too:hmm: If elvis take care of himself in the first place he would he today and that has nothing to do with the death of his mother.

[ehollier]

We seem to have gravitated to the Elvis drugs scenario rather than the original question!

Looking at the results in the poll (Is Elvis' Loss Of Mother Fundamental To His Death, 37 yes - 26 No) it suggests the fact that Elvis died because he couldn't get over the death of his mother or something other.... Am I getting this wrong?

Can someone please explain why the majority of people feel this way because I just don't understand that reasoning??!!

It is my belief that, although the death of Gladys was his biggest and not doubt deepest lost, he did not die because he couldn't get over her death. He died simply of his own excess and vices - poor diet, drugs, lifestyle brought on by his career.

[utmom2008]

All I suggested is that Elvis was much smarter than many give him credit. He didn't take these drugs without the realization that he was doing serious damage to his personal and professional life. He was quite aware of the damage he was doing to himself and his body, his family and career.

Again....I have to assume you have never dealt with a family member with a serious prescription drug addiction? Being smart or having a high IQ has nothing to do with an addiction, nothing!! An addict has no idea what they are doing to themselves, and they only learn what they have done after months of counseling coupled with re-hab.:blush: You make it sound as though only dumb people can be addicts and clueless to the damage they are doing. My mother-n-law was a smart woman, however, she didn't get up every day and take all of her pills and say "I am well aware of what this is doing to my family, my personal life and my health." The drugs led to a sedentary lifestyle which ultimately led to an early death!!!:blink::blush::blink::blush:

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

It is my belief that, although the death of Gladys was his biggest and not doubt deepest lost, he did not die because he couldn't get over her death. He died simply of his own excess and vices - poor diet, drugs, lifestyle brought on by his career.

Agreed, but there seems to be a lot of people who think this was the case, I wonder why they see him weakened by this event :hmm:I blame the Kurt Russell film which depicted Elvis as talking to his brother Jessie....


Again....I have to assume you have never dealt with a family member with a serious prescription drug addiction? Being smart or having a high IQ has nothing to do with an addiction, nothing!! An addict has no idea what they are doing to themselves, and they only learn what they have done after months of counseling coupled with re-hab.:blush: You make it sound as though only dumb people can be addicts and clueless to the damage they are doing. My mother-n-law was a smart woman, however, she didn't get up every day and take all of her pills and say "I am well aware of what this is doing to my family, my personal life and my health." The drugs led to a sedentary lifestyle which ultimately led to an early death!!!:blink::blush::blink::blush:

I agree drug dependency has little to do with IQ, however I believe you can be aware of you addictions without acknowledging your condition. Alcoholism and smoking are two other drugs that have a similar effect, you know that they can kill you however it is difficult to take that first step and then remain on the wagon. You know the effects but enjoy the feeling those drugs give you.

[TotallyInsane]

Agreed, but there seems to be a lot of people who think this was the case, I wonder why they see him weakened by this event :hmm:I blame the Kurt Russell film which depicted Elvis as talking to his brother Jessie....



I agree drug dependency has little to do with IQ, however I believe you can be aware of you addictions without acknowledging your condition. Alcoholism and smoking are two other drugs that have a similar effect, you know that they can kill you however it is difficult to take that first step and then remain on the wagon. You know the effects but enjoy the feeling those drugs give you.

Drinking and smoking - I can quit anytime I want to!!!!!! :lmfao::lmfao:

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

Drinking and smoking - I can quit anytime I want to!!!!!! :lmfao::lmfao:

I've quit the smoking now for 18 month's but has lead to a steady increase in the Alcohol :lmfao:

[cibetty]

I agree with Getlo on this one. It's a part of life, a natural part that ultimately shapes us as we grow older. After I became a parent I really understood the natural course that should happen. Losing a parent is devastating, but parents that have to bury a child is unthinkable.
Until I married and later had a son, my father and Elvis were the two men that I loved most in the world. They have both been gone a long long time, and I'm sure in some way that has shaped who I am today.:sad::sad:

Hey Rosanne, it really touched me what you wrote here, you're really honest and you said it beautifully. I didn't know your mother-in-law was an addict. Sorry to read this, I'm sure it wasn't easy for you and your husband. And you're right, my father was an alcoholic and he never admitted this! He never was aware of his own addiction and he never knew how sick he was and what alcohol did to him! It doesn't mean he was not a smart man, he was an amazing man, he was a kind of jack-of-all-trades beside his own work. Betti

[english-elvis-fan]

i voted yes

simply because ive always said if gladys hadnt died elvis would still be around and then i read this post

[utmom2008]

I've quit the smoking now for 18 month's but has lead to a steady increase in the Alcohol :lmfao:

Ohhhhh.....so that explains some of your posts.;) :lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

[utmom2008]

Hey Rosanne, it really touched me what you wrote here, you're really honest and you said it beautifully. I didn't know your mother-in-law was an addict. Sorry to read this, I'm sure it wasn't easy for you and your husband. And you're right, my father was an alcoholic and he never admitted this! He never was aware of his own addiction and he never knew how sick he was and what alcohol did to him! It doesn't mean he was not a smart man, he was an amazing man, he was a kind of jack-of-all-trades beside his own work. Betti

Thank you Betti, you always have the kindest words.:hug: I know you understand my point because you have been down the same road....and your father was gone long before his time due to his addictions. It's not easy to watch a loved with a terrible addiction deny that anything is wrong(the Dr. kept prescribing more) and that the drugs have completely changed their lifestyle and their health. Quite the contrary...since a Dr. prescribed them, then they must certainly need them.:blush::blink::blush::blink:

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

[/b]

Ohhhhh.....so that explains some of your posts.;) :lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

It explains most of them :P

[Unchained Melody]

Elvis was never completely free of drugs from the moment he took them in the army. So, he got clean (well, relatively straight anyway) for Aloha ... He was addicted to the stuff, plain and simple. No two ways about it.

He denied it, and you can continue to deny it. Doesn't change the fact that it is true.



Partially, yes. But it was Elvis' choice to be a music star, actor etc.

Agreed Getlo...it was definitley what he wanted...just in the end of his life, I don't think its what he expected would happen to him the way it all went down.

[Unchained Melody]

It is my belief that, although the death of Gladys was his biggest and not doubt deepest lost, he did not die because he couldn't get over her death. He died simply of his own excess and vices - poor diet, drugs, lifestyle brought on by his career.

The lifestyle definitley brought his life to an early end..The man had literally run out of life, and its apparent that he just didn't enjoy living anymore and thats sad..I've heard those say that elvis said several times in the last years he would rather be unconcious than miserable...:'(

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

i voted yes

simply because ive always said if gladys hadnt died elvis would still be around and then i read this post

Hi, Your comment and others of a similar vein intrigue me, I've asked on numerous occasions for people to give more information as to why they feel this way with little success. Please can you elaborate on your comments so I can fully understand your position.

[Unchained Melody]

Hi, Your comment and others of a similar vein intrigue me, I've asked on numerous occasions for people to give more information as to why they feel this way with little success. Please can you elaborate on your comments so I can fully understand your position.

Ok on that comment I would say that is because Gladys was one person Elvis would always listen to and I think she was one of those people who told Elvis thats the way it is...and was not a yes person like all those he had surrounded by him in the end and throughout his life. Maybe Gladys would have been the person to give him that kick in the butt son get yourself together or what have you...

[Diane]

Betti, your description of your dad could be mine as well.

Lucky you Matt, I'm still puffing. Maybe I should take up drinking so I wouldn't miss the smoking.:)

Diane

[Unchained Melody]

Betti, your description of your dad could be mine as well.

Lucky you Matt, I'm still puffing. Maybe I should take up drinking so I wouldn't miss the smoking.:)

Diane

Their both bad for you guys :lmfao:

[utmom2008]

Betti, your description of your dad could be mine as well.

Lucky you Matt, I'm still puffing. Maybe I should take up drinking so I wouldn't miss the smoking.:)

Diane

:clap::clap: Another "fellow" puffer!:lol::lol:

[KPM]

I´m with you on this one ehollier. I think he was well aware of what he was doing to himself, at least in the last years of his life and that he simply denied it to those around him because admitting it meant he had to do something about it. Maybe he felt he wasn´t able of cleaning his act.
I think in order to totally ever get off of drugs he did not need (and I do believe there were things he needed for medical reasons-and I know many think he needed nothing) I think the sleep problem he had since Tupelo would have had to somehow been explored and conquered. Since he would always need some type of sleeping medication- if it was never cured.
I think some therapy would have been needed to find out what caused this lifelong problem. If he did not need the downers at night that would have been a step toward getting off the stimulants to get him going each day.

[ehollier]

I think in order to totally ever get off of drugs he did not need (and I do believe there were things he needed for medical reasons-and I know many think he needed nothing) I think the sleep problem he had since Tupelo would have had to somehow been explored and conquered. Since he would always need some type of sleeping medication- if it was never cured.
I think some therapy would have been needed to find out what caused this lifelong problem. If he did not need the downers at night that would have been a step toward getting off the stimulants to get him going each day.

In one book that I read, it was stated that when he went into the hospital the first time in 1973 and the doctors treated him and he went through detox, he was down to 1 very mild sleeping pill at night, but.....I guess once he got home..........

[Diane]

He wasn't in long enough and didn't get the proper treatment. An addict needs counseling as well as a detox program or he will go right back to it nine times out of ten.

Diane

[utmom2008]

He wasn't in long enough and didn't get the proper treatment. An addict needs counseling as well as a detox program or he will go right back to it nine times out of ten.

Diane

Right Diane.(y) It takes months of counseling, and only a few days to actually detox. Detoxing is the easy part of recovery..it's what follows that is hard. Even after months of treatment the relapse occurence is staggering.:blink::blush:

[KPM]

In one book that I read, it was stated that when he went into the hospital the first time in 1973 and the doctors treated him and he went through detox, he was down to 1 very mild sleeping pill at night, but.....I guess once he got home..........
In the hospital its a very controlled situation-"they get you up on their schedule" they close down the halls "on their schedule" so someone else is controlling situations around you which force rest. If you do not sleep the night before-you can not sleep till noon the next day, they get you up for tests, breakfast, clean the room take your vitals etc....so eventually you begin to get into a better pattern of being so tired you sleep better.
(I have always hated that about hospitals the constant intrusions which actually wake you at all times of the night)
But sleep problems which start in childhood need alot of work to overcome-something caused them and a short trip into the hospital will not cure them.

[KPM]

He wasn't in long enough and didn't get the proper treatment. An addict needs counseling as well as a detox program or he will go right back to it nine times out of ten.

Diane
Detoxing just helps get the junk out of your system.
"Follow up" in the form of the counseling or therapy is vital -as you have said.
Also the battery of tests to find out if you have lack of certain hormones like melatonin etc...which cause sleep problems.
His sleep problem was not recent-it was a lifelong battle long before his fame hit-so the fame did not cause this IMO (it may have made it worse but was not the cause)

[utmom2008]

good points and l agree too (y)(y)

Jen, I have heard you say on more than one occasion that you give all the credit to your friends for making you see that you had a problem. You have said that they helped you so much during a time when you didn't think you had any problems. That makes me wonder why you agree here...:doh:...it's the opposite of what you have said in the past.:unsure::unsure:

[utmom2008]

His sleep problem was not recent-it was a lifelong battle long before his fame hit-so the fame did not cause this IMO (it may have made it worse but was not the cause)

(y) (y) (y) (y) (y)

[presley31]

Jen, I have heard you say on more than one occasion that you give all the credit to your friends for making you see that you had a problem. You have said that they helped you so much during a time when you didn't think you had any problems. That makes me wonder why you agree here...:doh:...it's the opposite of what you have said in the past.:unsure::unsure:

Elvis was addicted to drugs. Quite the contrary. All I suggested is that Elvis was much smarter than many give him credit. He didn't take these drugs without the realization that he was doing serious damage to his personal and professional life. Linda Thompson says that he admited that he was self-destructive


This is what l thought were good points cause thats the same with me l knew what drugs did to my body and did them without thinking of what could of happen. when you high you really don't have a care in the world till you life ruins out you don't get a second chance like elvis and than theres others who get saved and get to see another day. BUt l do agree with Linda that elvis was destructive and elvis really thought he could do anything and live to tell the stories. I only wish elvis friends and family were like me and saved elvis when he really needed.:'(

Yep like elvis l didn't think l had a problem but elvis drug problem was worse than mine.

[Unchained Melody]

Its interesting, elvis always would tell those around them when they were worried about him that he would live to see their graves...:'(

[tlcElvis]

I voted no but I think there is a gray area. I really think that if Elvis felt he had someone in his life who truly loved him for who he was and not what he had become, perhaps he wouldn't have felt so lonely. I guess in that sense his mom could have saved his life. I think she would have been perfectly happy having him as a furniture salesman...actually I think she would have preferred that to be his occupation. Perhaps loneliness helped fuel his drug use. I never got the feeling that he was really close to his father...or at least not anything like the relationship with his mom.

Off topic but perhaps drug use runs in Priscilla's family too. There is a story about Navarone using drugs at the link below. It's from a gossip site so the validity of the story is in question. I never see any pictures of him but there is one included with the story.

http://janetcharltonshollywood.com/gossip/priscilla_presley/priscilla_presleys_son_prefers_drugs_to_scientolog y_20080726.php

[Elvisgirl]

i don't think elvis died because he never got over his mothers death, but maybe he never got over her death......without that having anything to do with his own death, it's not strange to never get over someones death, if they were close to you. but no one knows if elvis did get over it, or not

[utmom2008]

Off topic but perhaps drug use runs in Priscilla's family too. There is a story about Navarone using drugs at the link below. It's from a gossip site so the validity of the story is in question. I never see any pictures of him but there is one included with the story.

http://janetcharltonshollywood.com/gossip/priscilla_presley/priscilla_presleys_son_prefers_drugs_to_scientolog y_20080726.php

He's also the story this week in the National Enquirer, of course they used Lisa's picture on the cover.:blush:(n) Navarone is a real "looker", isn't he? :supriced:The kind you want your daughter to bring home.;);) :lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

[The King's Queen]

He's also the story this week in the National Enquirer, of course they used Lisa's picture on the cover.:blush:(n) Navarone is a real "looker", isn't he? :supriced:The kind you want your daughter to bring home.;);) :lmfao::lmfao::lmfao:

YIKES SPIKES! :doh::doh: Wow! She should have stayed in Elvis' genepool for reproducing kids...Lisa sure looks much better than Navarone! And as for his being on drugs...I must ask, What would you expect??? :blink: After all, Pris isn't exactly the model parent, so his weird appearance and his alleged drug use does not surprise me one bit.

[The King's Queen]

Thank you Betti, you always have the kindest words.:hug: I know you understand my point because you have been down the same road....and your father was gone long before his time due to his addictions. It's not easy to watch a loved with a terrible addiction deny that anything is wrong(the Dr. kept prescribing more) and that the drugs have completely changed their lifestyle and their health. Quite the contrary...since a Dr. prescribed them, then they must certainly need them.:blush::blink::blush::blink:

Very well said Rosie! :notworthy And when a "Doctor" does continue to prescribe them, they do think that their problem is not a legitimate PROBLEM! My Dad is partially in the shape he is now because of a kook of a doctor who prescribed more narcotics than anyone would ever need! :angry: Dad thought that the fact that they came legally meant that he was NOT a junkie or addicted to them. WRONG!!! Elvis thought the same, I'm sure. Once addicted, the person doesn't see things clearly anymore and without the constant support of friends/family members, they rarely (if ever) manage to make it to get help.

[Diane]

That is the way that addictions work and if you have a doctor who either doesn't understand or doesn't care then the patient has a BIG problem.

It wouldn't surprise me if Navarone had a drug problem as I've heard that both boys did but with the article being in the Inquirer....taking that with a handful of salt!

Diane

[Unchained Melody]

In one book that I read, it was stated that when he went into the hospital the first time in 1973 and the doctors treated him and he went through detox, he was down to 1 very mild sleeping pill at night, but.....I guess once he got home..........

And that was the problem like many have said, it didn't do any good no matter how many times they detoxed him, soon as he went home, he hit the stash. There was no stopping it.

[utmom2008]

And that was the problem like many have said, it didn't do any good no matter how many times they detoxed him, soon as he went home, he hit the stash. There was no stopping it.

There is no stopping ANY addict if all they do is detox. That never ever works!!! There has to be lots and lots of counseling that goes along with it. This is one area where Elvis was NO different than than the average person on the street corner....no one stays clean and sober without therapy or counseling!!!!!!

[Unchained Melody]

There is no stopping ANY addict if all they do is detox. That never ever works!!! There has to be lots and lots of counseling that goes along with it. This is one area where Elvis was NO different than than the average person on the street corner....no one stays clean and sober without therapy or counseling!!!!!!

I think Elvis had to much pride to admit he had such a problem.

He was a very proud person, proud of who he was, what he become, and theres nothing wrong with that.

But he just didn't have it in him to say you know I think i have a problem and maybe I should check myself in. He would have never done such a thing.

[The King's Queen]

I think Elvis had to much pride to admit he had such a problem.

He was a very proud person, proud of who he was, what he become, and theres nothing wrong with that.

But he just didn't have it in him to say you know I think i have a problem and maybe I should check myself in. He would have never done such a thing.

Hmmmm....:hmm: Not so sure about that. Elvis was a very proud person, that is true. And even, I believe, proud to a fault at times. But on the other hand....

If we are to believe certain individuals who were around him quite a bit, he supposedly made mention to them on various occasions that he knew he had a problem and was (always) going to get some help or quit on his own. :blink: I don't know that I believe that he would have checked himself into a rehab center, but I do believe that he could have been coersed into seeking some form of help had those around him persisted and the "enablers" in his life chosen NOT to be such. Elvis had far too many willing accomplices when it came to scoring med's....:doh:

[Unchained Melody]

The only thing i've read or heard about him actually saying he had a problem was when Linda Thompson was quoted as saying in a moment of real brutal honesty I think my worst trait is that I have a streak of self-destructiveness

Also in 1977 Billy said that Elvis mentioned to him once when they were alone talking that he may sometimes take a little more medicine then he should have.

So sad :'(

[Diane]

I think he did realize at times at the end that he had a problem but he was too addicted by that time to take control. It should have been done in the early 60's before it got too serious, but then it wasn't really bothering him so he still thought it was prescription so it was fine and safe. I do blame Dr. Nick and the other doctors who kept passing it out to him....very unethical even if he was Elvis. Dr. Nick could have nipped that in the bud as soon as he hit the scene. Even the Colonel could have stepped in right at the beginning had he cared enough but maybe it was to his advantage and made Elvis more controllable..don't know.

Diane

[KPM]

There is no stopping ANY addict if all they do is detox. That never ever works!!! There has to be lots and lots of counseling that goes along with it. This is one area where Elvis was NO different than than the average person on the street corner....no one stays clean and sober without therapy or counseling!!!!!!
You are correct 100% the drugs were not the problem- it was the mindset which said drugs are the answer to every problem.
If you do not investigate the mental and possible physical reasons someone has an addictive problem-detoxing is a short term temporary help.
You are addressing the effects of addiction in detox-but little of the causes.

[utmom2008]

In one book that I read, it was stated that when he went into the hospital the first time in 1973 and the doctors treated him and he went through detox, he was down to 1 very mild sleeping pill at night, but.....I guess once he got home..........

Liz...you have said that your best friend is a counselor. Does she have any background in dealing with addictions? If you have any knowledge of drug addiction you'll know that the simple act of "detox" is the easy part. They even treat that part of it with other meds so that it's not quite so miserable while the body is ridding itself of the narcotic. If there is no heavy duty counseling, then the actual "detox" itself will mean nothing. Just because Elvis was down to one mild sleeping pill at night is neither here nor there. He was doomed to repeat the same pattern if no counseling was used.:blink::blink::blink:

[Diane]

That's true, you can't just de-tox an addict and expect him/her to stay straight. The addictive personality has to be addressed and dealt with and the sooner the better.

Diane

[8mmlowa]

The drug thing is way off topic in my opinion!

I don´t see any reason to put together elvis dead with the dead of his mother.

only in the way that there is a whole heart history in the family
all the presley men die from heartattack.

like million other people

he had the age ,he was overweight, +++

no big deal - so it has nothing to do with his mother!

if his mother would have lived i don´t think that he would have lived one hour longer.

my opinion.

[utmom2008]

The drug thing is way off topic in my opinion!
I don´t see any reason to put together elvis dead with the dead of his mother.
he had the age ,he was overweight, +++


I don't think it's off topic at all. IMO some people may think Elvis turned to drugs because of the loss of his mother at such a young age. Different events bring different responses from all of us. People can't help but wonder if there was some sort of a connection at some level. As far as "he had the age".....he was 42. He was not an old man.:blink::blush:

[8mmlowa]

no but in THE age between 40 and 50 thats THE age for it

[Diane]

Gladys death may have been a contributing factor to Elvis' drug habit but only in the way that he must have missed her as not only being his mother but the only person he completely trusted and felt he could turn to. I think she left quite a gap in his life when she passed.

Diane

[Jumpsuit Junkie]

You are correct 100% the drugs were not the problem- it was the mindset which said drugs are the answer to every problem.
If you do not investigate the mental and possible physical reasons someone has an addictive problem-detoxing is a short term temporary help.
You are addressing the effects of addiction in detox-but little of the causes.

100% Agreed Ken, there was a different mindset in the 70's, there was a pill to fix all ailments and the mindset that Elvis had was if it came from a doctor it was alright :supriced: I'm pretty sure that Gladys would have been pretty similar in her beliefs.

I agree that Elvis wouldn't have lived a minute longer if Gladys had survived, her influence over Elvis would have been limited. Elvis would have spoiled her more than anyone whoever lived. Yes she could have shouted or gave him a good talking to but Elvis would have explained he needed those drugs.... After all a Doctor prescribed them!

[Diane]

There is that too but maybe when Gladys saw what was happening to Elvis she might have questioned things more strongly. I don't know if he would have been able to talk his way through her or not. They seemed to have babied and spoiled each other but I think she would also have given Dr. Nick a talking to.

Diane

[Tommy]

How about Vernon if he couldn't help why would have Gladys?

[utmom2008]

How about Vernon if he couldn't help why would have Gladys?

IMO it seems like Gladys probably wore the pants in the family. Something tells me that Vernon wasn't a take-charge kind of guy.;) And, Vernon didn't want to upset the apple cart..he was still thankful that he was able to retire at the ripe old age of 40.;);) :lol::lol::lol:

[Unchained Melody]

How about Vernon if he couldn't help why would have Gladys?

Gladys had a far more strong influence over Elvis than Vernon ever had IMO.

THough I am with Matt, I think Elvis would have spoiled her to death and in the end it always goes back to Elvis. There was no one who could've stopped his death but Elvis himself but he never did, almost like he gave up in the end but tried the best he could to manage from day to day, but not the right way.:'(

[Diane]

Elvis was unable to think straight anymore in the last few years and had no one to guide him to find the right kind of help. The same would have happened to anyone in his shoes. It's so easy to look at someone else's mistakes and think we could have done better.

Diane

[MissyM]

Gladys had a hard time controlling Elvis when he was a child. It wasn't just that she spoiled him a bit, he had a tendancy to be rebellious and on the wild side. That was just his personality.
There are a few things that I think would have been different had she lived. But some things not.
The only influence I think she may have had on Elvis's drug use is that perhaps if it was directly effecting her and making her worry, on a longer term, that may have made him want to straighten up. (for her) The love he had for her was great and sometimes that can be part of wanting to change. But it would have had to be coupled with his will to change for himself as well.

[presley31]

I think galdys would of said something but l really don't think elvis would of listerned or maybe he would of said ok mom and took them behind her back, elvis liked what they did to him so whos telling if things would of been different or not.

[Unchained Melody]

I think galdys would of said something but l really don't think elvis would of listerned or maybe he would of said ok mom and took them behind her back, elvis liked what they did to him so whos telling if things would of been different or not.

Agreed, no one was going to change his ways.:supriced:

[KPM]

I think galdys would of said something but l really don't think elvis would of listerned or maybe he would of said ok mom and took them behind her back, elvis liked what they did to him so whos telling if things would of been different or not.
Elvis had always tried to listen to her and respect her opinion and feelings up to her death.
So if she had lived past 1958 she would have been a constant influenceon him and his life. I can't see that that would not have had some lasting effect on him.
She would probably have made the trip to Germany, would his relationship with Priscilla gone on as it did? Would she have not made a difference in all situtations in which she would have been involved?
So if thats the case-perhaps her continued interaction with Elvis on a daily basis into the 70s might have changed many things that he did and the way that he did them. He would have always had the thougth-
"What will Mom think about this?"

[Unchained Melody]

Good points Ken. The thing is though we will never know had Gladys lived if it would've had an effect on Elvis' lifestyle. IMO it would have not went down the way it did in the end had she been there. But thats JMO.

[Diane]

I also think Elvis would have continued to take the pills behind Gladys back but I also think she would have been on his back once she found out what he was doing and rode his back big time. I don't think Gladys was ever blind to what Elvis did not would she just sit back and let him destroy himself. She would have nagged until he listened.

Diane

[Unchained Melody]

I also think Elvis would have continued to take the pills behind Gladys back but I also think she would have been on his back once she found out what he was doing and rode his back big time. I don't think Gladys was ever blind to what Elvis did not would she just sit back and let him destroy himself. She would have nagged until he listened.

Diane

It is such ashame he didn't have someone like that in the end of his life. Maybe he did have some that would occasionally say something to him but not to often. Imagine watching someone you love destroy themself day after day, knowing you can't really do anything about it besides watch it happen. Talk about being tied and fried.

[KPM]

Good points Ken. The thing is though we will never know had Gladys lived if it would've had an effect on Elvis' lifestyle. IMO it would have not went down the way it did in the end had she been there. But thats JMO.
I agree, I have no idea what his lifes course would have been had she lived into the 70s. But we know how he loved and respected her from childhood until her death, so IMO thats some idea of his attitude towards her and it gives an indication of what his attitude would have been past 1958.
If Elvis ever had a "rudder" in his life to keep the ship on course I would have to give that distinction to his mom. But even with a good rudder, ships get off course so what difference in his life it would have made is surely debateable.
You would not think one persons life or death could affect someone so deeply but some cases it does.
Dean Martin was Mr. Cool- a true tough guy. IMO (like Sinatra appeared to be)He had been a boxer in his teens, a black jack dealer, and finally began to sing.
He very seldom let anything bother him-outwardly. His break-up with Jerry Lewis, his parents deaths, his divorce from his wife Jeanne, his health problems in the late 80s- he took them all in stride. Then in 1987 his favorite son, Dean Paul Martin, was killed in a jet fighter plane crash in the mountains while on training duty with the National Guard. According to many close to Martin, his ex-wife Jeanne, his other children, Jerry Lewis, and Sinatra-that is when Dean Martin began his slow death. It was something he could not deal with, and he began to retreat. Sammy Davis and Sinatra tried to get him out of his depression in 1988 by setting up a 3 man concert tour and Martin gave it a couple nights and just abruptly left. He quit performing altogether after 1991-horrid pictures showed up in the Enquirer of him without his teeth, looking sick. His health problems multiplied- emphysema and later lung cancer.
He died on Christmas morning in 1995 at his home- alone. But all who knew him well say he died in 1987 after his sons plane crashed.
Would he have retreated in 1988 if his son had lived? Would his health have gone downhill so rapidly if he had stayed active as he had always been, engaged in life, performing, having fun-instead of the depression which gripped his life after the sons crash. Something to think about.:blush:

[Unchained Melody]

I agree, I have no idea what his lifes course would have been had she lived into the 70s. But we know how he loved and respected her from childhood until her death, so IMO thats some idea of his attitude towards her and it gives an indication of what his attitude would have been past 1958.
If Elvis ever had a "rudder" in his life to keep the ship on course I would have to give that distinction to his mom. But even with a good rudder, ships get off course so what difference in his life it would have made is surely debateable.
You would not think one persons life or death could affect someone so deeply but some cases it does.
Dean Martin was Mr. Cool- a true tough guy. IMO (like Sinatra appeared to be)He had been a boxer in his teens, a black jack dealer, and finally began to sing.
He very seldom let anything bother him-outwardly. His break-up with Jerry Lewis, his parents deaths, his divorce from his wife Jeanne, his health problems in the late 80s- he took them all in stride. Then in 1987 his favorite son, Dean Paul Martin, was killed in a jet fighter plane crash in the mountains while on training duty with the National Guard. According to many close to Martin, his ex-wife Jeanne, his other children, Jerry Lewis, and Sinatra-that is when Dean Martin began his slow death. It was something he could not deal with, and he began to retreat. Sammy Davis and Sinatra tried to get him out of his depression in 1988 by setting up a 3 man concert tour and Martin gave it a couple nights and just abruptly left. He quit performing altogether after 1991-horrid pictures showed up in the Enquirer of him without his teeth, looking sick. His health problems multiplied- emphysema and later lung cancer.
He died on Christmas morning in 1995 at his home- alone. But all who knew him well say he died in 1987 after his sons plane crashed.
Would he have retreated in 1988 if his son had lived? Would his health have gone downhill so rapidly if he had stayed active as he had always been, engaged in life, performing, having fun-instead of the depression which gripped his life after the sons crash. Something to think about.:blush:

Theres always so many things to think about like this Ken. There are so many What If's in Elvis' lifetime so many what might have been its depressing to the extreme to think about. I beleive in the saying everything happens for a reason....:'(

[KPM]

Theres always so many things to think about like this Ken. There are so many What If's in Elvis' lifetime so many what might have been its depressing to the extreme to think about. I beleive in the saying everything happens for a reason....:'(
Yes I agree-and so many "What ifs in everyones lifetime" its universal to all.;)

[Unchained Melody]

Yes I agree-and so many "What ifs in everyones lifetime" its universal to all.;)

Very true buddy !! (y)

[dstrattenfan]

I believe that her death is what started the roller coaster ride downhill. She was E's world...

When I lost my grandpa who raised me I turned to drugs because I didn't know what to do I was lonely...Then 2 months later I found my brother who had overdosed dead on the floor...It took 5 years but I ended up having a nervous breakdown at 25..These 2 people were all I had and I just couldn't take it....With the loss of my papaw and then my brother I am surprised I lived...That was in 2001 .

So I do feel her death is what started his downfall....IMO I do think if she had lived E still maybe here..He would have felt that he had someone to turn too...Speaking from experience if my papaw would have lived I never would have turned to drugs because I would have been devastated if he had foundout...The one thing I could never stand was when he was disappointed in me that was worst than anything to me

And there is no doubt that Gladys would have been disappointed in E if she knew that he was on drugs....She hid her drinking because she was ashamed.
Any addict never wants a person they love to fallow in their footsteps. And I think Gladys would have been no different